Understanding Attachment Styles: The Key to Healthier Relationships

Attachment styles—what are they, and why do they matter in relationships? As a therapist, I often hear clients express confusion or frustration about patterns they notice in their connections with others. Perhaps you’ve experienced this, too: feeling overly clingy or distant, being drawn to unavailable partners, or fearing intimacy altogether. These patterns may not be random—they may be rooted in your attachment style.

What Are Attachment Styles?

Attachment theory, developed by John Bowlby and expanded by Mary Ainsworth, explains how early experiences with caregivers shape the way we relate to others throughout our lives. Based on these early interactions, we develop an internal blueprint, or “attachment style,” that influences how we form and maintain relationships.

There are four main attachment styles, each of which, we will cover in depth in our next blog posts.


Liza Linder, MSW, LCSW, is a therapist with 30 years of experience serving the LGBTQ+ and PLWHIV communities. Liza is in person only, in our Philadelphia offices. For more information about Liza, please click on the therapist’s bios.